Today... Pretty much a completely crap day. This is quite possibly our lowest point so far.
Tova has more spots today, much worse than yesterday.
I am feeling scared, angry, helpless, scared... She is still tired and feeling sick. She has a sore throat and a cough.
I wish we had never come here (But in reality I wouldn't have done anything differently). Very confusing.
Little princess Tova didn't eat anything for breakfast, we think her throat hurts too much and she generally feels too sick to eat.
Back to PEG feeding to give her the power to kick this bug in the f*#*ing arse! OMFG, I don't want this to be happening. I want Tova to never suffer again. She has suffered enough in her little life. Stupid sickness! Leave my baby alone idiot virus!
After a second opinion on the spots we are slightly reassured that they are 'only' to do with the virus she has..... hmmm..
Eva was with the doctor when he examined Tova, it was nice to hear her common sense and compassionate words. She is extremely lovely to Tova, talking to her in a soothing way (in German) and showing us that she truly cares.
Tova was admitted to the hospital as an inpatient today as she isn't improving fast enough to make everyone 'happy'.
After another blood test coming back 'normal' we all decided that Tova would be better off at home with us. No admission. What a ride!
We are home now with our spotty Tova (spots aren't C.pox looking, more rash like).
The NZ baby has a fever and has been admitted for the night. Happy birthday for tomorrow!
Basically it has been a week from hell and we are tired, scared and sick of wishing that tomorrow will bring us new hope.
Finally this evening there has been a small change in Tova, she is less vacant and a touch more focused. We even got some magic smiles from her. Is she coming back to us? All of a sudden PEG feeding isn't so bad!!
We haven't been feeding her full PEG feeds, just what we feel is enough to give her some fight.
She still isn't wanting to eat more than a couple of mills at a time.
Today has been emotional. The entire week has been emotional. The entire TRIP has been emotional.
New ticket booked for a little bit later than original. Home, we miss you!